the letter
by project3dx
Summary: ........he'll never know how i feel. its for the best i guess.
1. Default Chapter

Okay this is my first store! So I don't own anything from digimon so don't sue!!!!!!!! Anyway you can't!!! hahahaha! I'm poor!!!!  
The Letter  
  
I'm too afraid to give this to you for the fear you'll call me a freak. So I keep my troubles inside my heart. We've only been friends for a couple of months but to me it feels like years. Its funny when we meant you didn't even want to look at me. I think you thought I was weird. I do have a big mouth and I'm a little jumpy. But that's not the point the point is when I saw you I felt something. At that time I didn't know what it was but as we got to know each other I knew I had feelings for you. We are different I know that but I think that's what drawn me to you. I love your smile your laugh. The way you look at me when you have no idea what I'm talking about. And the one thing that really caught me was your eyes. There just that perfect blue, that makes me want to melt when you look at me. Sometime I think you just might catch me staring so I say something stupid to cover it up. Ha. I guess I have it down to a since. I star at you, you catch me. I say something stupid and you look at me like as if I was high and then we would both laugh about it. I guess I feel better about this now since I wrote it down. Now I can burn it! Not really I can't do that. I just a part of me want you to know that I love you. 


	2. the journal

Wow I suck at writing! Anyway sorry about that I thought you guys would know it was Tai writing about Matt. Also if you guys want to take my idea thats okay I won't get mad. I suck anyway......  
Okay this chapter is about Matt's Journal.... and its in Matt's point of view.  
it takes place about the same time Tai writes his...  
The Journal  
3/21  
  
  
I really hate him. He seems so perfect at times it just scares me. Not perfect in the smart kind of way ether but in away that makes everyone smile. Its like when he enters a room, it just lights up. And you have to smile at that because its just amazing.  
  
Sometimes when were studying I feel his eyes on me.. It make me feel warm inside. When I turn around he just puts on that stupid grin and then says something so stupid that I just think he's high( you know high on life type of thing). And then we just laugh trying to forget the whole thing ever happen. But I can't forget. And its getting harder for me to just be the silent friend, the one who keep all his a motions inside. He is the only one that knows most of my secrets and beside my father, he is the only one thats seen me cry . Okay now I know I'm getting all emotional and crap but I can't help it. We've only known each other for a year. And to me it feels like so much more.  
  
God, I went to college to find myself. To find out what I'm really good at. I know for a fact music is not going to pay the bills. But instead I found friends and Tai. I know I have feelings for him but I really dough he has feelings for me. Your going to ask me how do I know, well I sort of gave this test to all my new friends just to see were they stand on that issue. Believe me I didn't go and just say, " Hey Izzy do you like guy in a sexual way?" and or "you okay with one of your friends being BI Joe?" Believe me, I'm not stupid, all I did was observe. I`ve watched Joe and Izzy but they have been friends for many years so I dough their like that. Sora, I question sometimes just because..... well, I'm not going their. Mimi, well she just to girlie. Then theirs Tai, he is different because well I'll tell you.......  
  
One day we were in the cafeteria and Sora came out and just asked everyone if they ever thought someone from the same sex was hot? Joe said the only guy he thought was hot was himself. We all laughed at him. Then Izzy said if he was a girl would go for the brainy types. Note: they both just went around the bush and didn't really answer the question. Sora said she thought the girl in Tomb Raider was hot. And Mimi said she is not like that but she did think some of the girl that look better than her were hot. Then when it came to me all I said was yes. Mimi asked me who I thought was hot and all I told her was people who are hotter than me. Tai on the other hand just said no. And said he never thought of any guy as hot. The thing that hurt me was the way he said it. He didn't look at anyone when he said those words. It was as if he was saying that to himself. And then after he said those words he turn to me but he was looking right through me. It was hard talking to him after that.  
  
We are still friends but I feel their some tension between us. And to make it worse spring brake is starting and I might just tell him how I feel. What's their to lose? My friendship for one and my dignity. I'll just have to see how this plays out. Wish me luck.  
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authers notes- let me tell you uploading this sucks. it doesn't come out at all the way you type it.  
Anyway, I hope this chapter was better. If you guys have any Ideas please tell me. I do listen! 


	3. March 23rd the journal

Hey its me! Project3dx! I know I made a lot of spelling mistakes and I   
have bad grammar. But just tell what I did wrong and I'll try not to   
do it next time. Remember this is my first store on fanfiction.net.   
Hell, Its my first store ever! So give me some credit! :p  
  
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the journal 3/23  
  
  
It seems things are getting better between me and him.   
Which is great because the first couple of days after the "incident" he   
didn't seem to want to go near me. Which made me feel like crap! Its   
only Sunday and spring brake isn't even half way over yet.  
  
  
And for the past two weeks Sora had this idea to have a   
coed sleep over up in her Aunts summer cabin. I didn't believe her at   
first but she really pulled it off. So now were going, all six of us, in   
one cabin. I really don't want to go. I not the camping kind of guy.   
I'm more of a city guy. I need TV, AC, Heat and a lot of other   
things to make me happy. And anyway my gel attracts bugs. I don't   
like bugs.....and snakes and anything that goes creepy-crawly in the   
night. Just to note I'm not afraid of them. I just don't like them.   
  
  
And to make it worse, I still think Tai feels uncomfortable   
being around me. I guess he figure out that I am BI. I mean it   
shouldn't be hard to guess after that, you know thing that happen.   
Maybe I becoming paranoid or the camping thing is starting to get to  
me I don't know.  
  
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wow... i got it done! I know my chapters are short but I'm not the   
greatest writer in the world so help me out here! Have any questions or   
ideas email me. 


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